It’s come to my attention recently that people have different methods for taking a shit. I was naive in thinking that there was a uniform process for what seemed a very simple thing. Some people stand up to wipe, others sit like normal humans. My own technique is a modified sit to shit that I have dubbed Shirt off to Shit or SOTS for short.
Ever since I was little I’ve been taking my shirt off to take a dump. My rationale was that in order to get my shirt out of the way in order to wipe, I should just take the shirt off altogether. There is another benefit as well though, if you happen to be wearing a long shirt it could get in the way of your dong when taking a piss or if you want to scratch your balls or something. That being said, I have indeed had a shirt on while taking a dump before and it’s something that I can do with no problems, but it’s just more comfortable for me to have my shirt off.
There are some instances where I won’t take my shirt off. One of which is sometimes when I’m in a public bathroom. It really depends because I’ve been in a public bathroom and have taken my shirt off, other times I kept it on for safety reasons. Here’s how I do it, if the area looks clean I’ll pull my pants down and put the shirt on top of my pants so there is no contact with the floor. If it’s a really nasty bathroom I won’t risk putting my shirt anywhere near the floor. Another thing to take into consideration is what you are wearing. If it’s casual wear it’s usually safe to take the shirt off. If it’s a button up with a tie perhaps in an office environment, I don’t suggest taking the shirt off, not because you should be afraid of ridicule from your fellow office workers, but merely because it’s a pain in the ass to take off a button up and put it somewhere without wrinkling it. The answer in this situation is to roll your sleeves up, unbutton the top button, and go to town with your shirt on.
If you’re on the fence about this radical new movement, give it a try in the comfort of your own home. You will feel a new freedom you’ve never realized before, and that’s what we’re about here at Liquorfists.